How To Break The Script — My Event Design Checklist

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Today, I am sharing my full event design process. My human-centered design process. All the way from conceptualization to closing ceremony.

Virtual parties during COVID.

During COVID, I led hundreds of virtual events. Thankfully, I documented my processes and learnt that I kept forgetting important steps. How things have changed…

Virtual or physical, I put a lot more effort into designing my events than most hosts. You see, being intentional is very rare among hosts. Part of my life purpose is to change this. By the end of this article, I hope that you will gather more intentionally, selectively, and courageously.

Design and intention are one and the same. Therefore, most hosts do not participate in any design process. Or… they merely follow the script.

Script: Promote the glory of the venue and speakers, invite a bunch of people, give them alcohol and food, let them mingle, and wait until the gathering fizzles out.

Breaking the script will help you transform your guests’ lives. It will help you generate more long-term customer relationships. And, it will give you more fulfillment.

Let’s dive into my checklist. Step. By. Step. Follow this checklist if you want to create a deep sense of comradery and belonging at your event.

The Conceptualization

1. Why are you hosting this event? Ask why five times. Write an explicit purpose.
2. What objective result do you want? What post-event survey question matters to you?
3. Who must be included in the planning? Include stakeholders, the host, and leaders in the audience.
4. Who should be invited? Minimize the number of participants to maximize connection AND specificity of outcome.
5. Who can and should be the host? Choose someone who is an enthusiastic YES to being the face of the event.

Note: Dan, from More Space Is Light, sent me this note. It illustrates the relationship between the number of guests and the specificity of outcome.

The Invitation

A lot of hosts will create merely a calendar invitation or Eventbrite page. This is not an invitation. An invitation makes the recipient feel special, informed, and excited.

Now, I just spent the last 15 minutes searching the internet for a great invitation. I could not find one. This is what I learnt: Most invitations are generic and do not come from the host. An invitation is best when it is a personal message from the host. Human-to-human.

Effective invitations…

1. Clarify and communicate the purpose of the event, explicitly.
2. Set the social norms or expectations for how to behave at your event. Is it formal or silly?
3. Build credibility with your audience. Can they trust you as the host?
4. Give them an agenda with activities so that they can consent to them.
5. Give your guests reasons to participate fully in the agenda’s activities. What’s in it for me? WIIFM.
6. Educate your guests on how to connect meaningfully. Ask them to turn off their phones, encourage personal question-asking and story-telling, and discourage ‘hogging the mic.’

Note on #6. The logic here is that most people lack the relational intelligence and self-awareness to create deep connections. If you create guardrails, you can increase the likelihood that people will have deeper conversations.

Choose a format — Text, audio, video, GIF. A mix of video and text is the best approach. The video should be personal and feature the host’s face.

Choose a delivery — One-on-one messages are not always possible. Just please, whatever you do, don’t do a mass email. This is NOISE. Other delivery methods: Announcement at an event, written notes, text messages.

Here’s an example of what my guests hear before they jump into my zoom room. I chose audio because it is easy to consume. If you choose audio, don’t use a horrible microphone as I did 😥

The Greeting

The first feeling you want your guests to experience. What is it? I bet you it’s a sense of being accepted and celebrated. That’s the goal of greeting — to make your guests feel like they belong at your event.

1. Identify your greeters and create a greeting team.

2. Greet your guests with positivity and one-on-one acknowledgement, using their names. Music is recommended during this process.

Note: One of my favorite ways to greet people is to play their favorite song as they arrive.

3. Give your guests something to do as they arrive. Answer the question “what next?” for them.

Note: My favorite way to engage guests as they arrive is: ‘Missions.’ A mission is a task involving human connection on a slip of paper, in a jar. Participants reach into the jar, take a mission, and consent to doing it. ex. Ask someone about an embarrassing childhood memory.

4. Reiterate the purpose and culture of your event. Answer the question: “Why are we here?” and “How should I behave?”

The Opening

The opening ceremony has the goal of creating a group identity. You want your guests to say to themselves: “We’re all a part of this together. I can talk to anyone here.”

1. Assemble the group in a giant circle.

2. Have the host give a short speech and welcome, while role modelling unpretentiousness and imperfection.

3. Change your audience’s physiology with movement and music. The goal here is to evoke positive emotions. When these are present, humans become more prosocial and creative.

4. Incorporate a ‘turn to your neighbor’ or small group exercise. That is, get your guests interacting with each other. You can offer a prompt for guests to answer, or you can provide a nonverbal game.

Note: The more interactivity among participants, the better. My motto for opening and closing ceremonies is “Vulnerability + Joy = Belonging.”

The Intermissions

If your event has content or presentations, the intermissions are important moments to recalibrate the mental focus and energy in the room.

1. Engage your audience with short exercises, prompts, and games.

Note: My favorite engagement activity for intermissions is the 3-stage connection energizer: relaxation, vitality, and belonging. I’ll do three exercises in a fast paced sequence.

The Closing

The closing ceremony matters because humans remember peaks and ends — this is a well-known psychological bias. Because of this, the ending of your event has a huge impact on the memory of it. Thus, you want the closing ceremony to create two feelings — exhilaration & heart-feltness.

1. Energize your audience with music and movement.

2. Put your guests into small groups, give them a prompt, and invite them to be vulnerable.

Note: One word check-outs is an option. Guests each take turns sharing one word they’re leaving the event with.

3 In the larger group, invite your guests to share what they felt or experienced at the event. The following script works well: “Would anyone like to share their word, a thank you, a story, or an inspiration with the group?” (After they share) “Would you like to nominate the next person?”

4. End in a circle with a calming song. Have the host offer some final words of encouragement, uniting everyone around the purpose of the event.

Note: The Oath, Toast, Boast exercise is one of my favorites for ending my events.

The Fizzling

This period is about free-form social time. People can connect with whomever they want while sipping beverages or eating. This section puts freedom into your guests’ hands. Because they’ve gone through a journey together, their connections will be more meaningful. Usually, events begin with this. Don’t do that.

1. Serve food or drinks and allow people to mingle and explore the space. If you serve people earlier in the event, they’ll be distracted from the organized program.

2. Allow participants to engage with any stations or self-serve activities you’ve set up. ex. Photo booth, parlor games, psychic, or crafts.

Note: I have recommendations for self-serve stations too!

Summary

Use this checklist once, and you won’t go back to the script. Beware. Guests may also form lifelong friendships. If you don’t want that, go back to hosting your cocktail happy hour.

Final Recommendation

Incorporate connection & energy snacks throughout your event.

10 seconds. If you’re feeling thankful, could you like or comment on this article? What wisdom do you have to share with other readers? We’d love to hear your additions.

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Thanks for spreading healthier human connections 🧠

— Jacques The Party Scientist, BSc. Pharmacology